March Newsletter 2015

March newsletter cats

I'm thinking about becoming a Hobbit and moving to Middle Earth - Cleo

The Thinker - Eli

Vol. 666 No. 991

Did everyone survive the Ides of March?

No, the better question is, are you surviving Daylight Saving Time? Who would like to move to Arizona this time of year where they don't have DST, and all is normal and pleasant and you don't wake up in the bottom of a witch's cauldron, having lost an hour of your life, not to be returned if it so happens you croak before things return to normal in the Fall? But football surely will resurrect you. Trust me on this.

Saguaro cactus wavingThe Tucson Festival of Books -- I was there dressed in three and a half inch heels --- and then I wised up and changed to dirt-walking flats and dumped the suit.  The weather was warm, the saguaro cacti were waving their thick green arms (takes 50 years to grow the first one. Can you imagine if we were all saguaro cacti?), beautiful desert all around you. The festival was held on the vast University of Arizona campus. Both Saturday and Sunday approximately 100,000 folk showed up. So many people, and miles to walk from A to B, then you get back to your hotel and, I'm not lying here, the room was a good 1/4 of a mile from the lobby.  So again, miles to go before you sleep. (I kid you not, the room service people who brought you breakfast were all skinny, I mean how many miles did they walk before 7:00 o'clock every single morning?)

I was on three panels Saturday and Sunday, and gave a Workshop on how not to make the reader barf (well, not really the title, actually,  Non-Emetic Writing). Lots of laughter and lots of very nice people, and all of them READERS, and there's no finer a person in the universe.

Had a flight attendant on the way from Tucson to Phoenix, who was so tired, she was trying to get us to "fashion our leg belts." And amazingly enough, Phoenix airport was CROWDED with orange T-shirts and Giants fans -- yes, spring training.  And even though the flights were oversold, everyone was in a good mood because they'd had a great old time watching the zillion baseball games. Evidently the fun thing about going to spring training games is that you're rubbing shoulders with all very cool players on the team, like right next to you, sipping out of your beer can.

Speaking of beer, who drinks green beer on St. Patty's Day? Who is force-fed cabbage? Now the corned beef is pretty good, but why push it with cabbage? Never understood that. In any case, have a great St. Patrick's Day and if the newsletter gets to you after you've tried/puked up the cabbage, hope you had a blast regardless --